All about how we became one

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Becoming one...written by Steve and edited by Brandon.

The summer of partying...

It was a normal summer night. I had driven to our favorite 7-11 to
meet Dave and some friends for our regular night of drinking and
toking.....after all....it was summer.....not that the season made a
difference really. I was sitting in my car with Minh, his older brother
Miles, and a few other friends waiting for Dave. For some reason
I wasn't in the mood to drink so I just pounded the sounds for
everyone in the parking lot. Dave finally arrived.......late as usual.
This time he was not alone. Who was with him? I hadn't seen this
face before. Who was he? He looked awful young to be hanging
out with a bunch of us delinquents. I found out after meeting him
that he was Dave's brother and younger by six years. His name?......
Brandon. He was 12 years old at the time.

Dave got out of his car and I out of mine. We all met to plan our
strategy for the evening ritual. Seeing that I was in no mood for
drinking that night Dave introduced me to his younger brother
Brandon so that he might have some company to hang with who
wasn't concerned only with getting totally blitzed. We sat in my
car and got to know each other slowly and cautiously for 8 hours.
By the end of the night Brandon had become the Dee Jay for the
parking lot from my car's stereo and we had become fairly good
friends. It was an uneventful night but somehow it still lingers in
my mind like it happened yesterday. Something just clicked between
us that night. Bran has a way about him and has the ability to make
me crack up whenever he wants and it seems he enjoyed doing
just that. I also enjoyed his antics immensely as I soon found out
that night. Brandon was (and still is) a great kid (person), somewhat
shy with most people, but genuinely friendly and happy.

We were an eclectic bunch. Quite a mix of characters and races.
Vietnamese/Caucasian, Hawaiian, Japanese, Japanese/Caucasian,
Chinese, Filipino, Caucasian.....and of varying ages. We partied
hardy virtually every night. Soon Brandon became a fixture at these
gatherings and often he and I would just sit in the car and make the
sounds throb for everyone because drinking hasn't ever really been
near the top of my priority list. I'd smoke my Marlboros and he'd
play the tunes for the gang. It was a great summer. It was one of
those summer that a person remembers forever.

The phone rings...

Sometime later.....maybe a year or so....my phone rings. Like duh...
it always rings. This time this call would be different though. "Hi it's
Brandon. What's up?" What's up is right! How did he know my
number? I hadn't given it to him. "Can you come and pick me up?
Can we go out and do something? I'm bored." Sure........why not I
thought...no harm. I wasn't a bad influence. I didn't drink when Bran
was around and enjoyed doing the same stuff he did.....after all.....I've
never grown up myself. Soon the calls became fairly regular and we'd
go out, sometimes with the gang and sometimes off on our own, to the
arcade, beach, out cruising, or just over to my place to watch TV or play
video games. We really enjoyed each other's company. We didn't need
the gang or booze or pakalolo to have fun. Eventually I would either be
hanging with Dave and his friends or just with Brandon. Brandon slowly
stopped coming to the nightly binges. It was just as well. It wasn't a very
good idea for him to hang out with a bunch of rowdy drunks at his age
anyway. I eventually had to start making choices who to hang with.
My time was gradually being divided evenly between partying with the
boys and being a pal to Brandon. Oh yeah...Bran had snuck my number
from Dave's phone number pad because I'm unlisted.

Video games and the beach...

Eventually every day the phone would ring and it would be Brandon.
"Can you come pick me up? I'm bored again." Heck.....why not......
by then Bran had endeared himself to me. He had become the little
brother I never had but had always wanted. By this time no one gave
a second thought to our age difference....our friendship was so genuine
and so natural to everyone that knew us that this factor was never an
issue. No one questioned it and we truly enjoyed each other's company.
Besides, for me, being with him kept me from going out with the boys &
drinking which I was slowly getting tired of anyway. Shit...I even quit
smoking cigarettes because they bothered Brandon. When together we'd
either go to the beach to boogie board, played Street Fighter or simply
cruised around in the car and listened to music. I was the pilot and my
co pilot was Bran my dee jay. We would also pack along my first dog
everywhere. She was a Chihuahua and was used to being snuck into taboo
places. Life was oh so simple and so sweet. I really enjoyed hanging out
with my very own personal comedian. Boy he would kick my ass playing
video games (and he still does) and never lets me forget it. Shoot...I didn't
mind....I was having the time of my life just being a kid too. I would still
go out and party with the boys but Brandon wasn't coming out with the
gang any longer. Eventually the ritualistic bingeing was getting to me.
I gradually stopped attending the partying every night with the gang
because being with Brandon doing simple things was much more fun.
Friday and Saturday nights soon became a regular event for Brandon
and myself often just cruising around Waikiki with the sounds cranked
loud enough to annoy folks for blocks....especially the piggies. Virtually
every afternoon and evening were devoted to the beach, video games,
or something that was fun. Strangely....I didn't miss hanging out with the
gang any longer. I started enjoying the simpler things again....the things
Brandon liked....they were the same things I had always liked but hadn't
done for some time and soon started to enjoy again. We got along so well.
Just like 2 peas in a pod.

The accident...

About 3 months before the picture of Brandon and my new pup Ipo
was taken we were off to the beach again. By this time I was also carting
around Bran's friends too. Sandy Beach is where we usually went if town
was flat but today so was Sandy Beach. "Hey....let's go to Makapuu." On
this day I hadn't felt like going into the water and had packed my mountain
bike along with the 6 boogie boards, a car load of beach bums and one
cherished Chihuahua. Her name was Kiki. She was a special dog. She
went where I went at all times. She had been to the Big Island six times,
Lanai once, Kauai once, countless times snuck into the zoo, God knows
how many eateries, and work. She was my shadow. Can you picture
a Chihuahua on a raft tethered to my leg 100 feet from shore while I was
snorkeling? She did it all. On that fateful day I brought her most favorite
of possessions, a custom made backpack for her to go riding with me on
the bike. Boy she loved that.... more than traveling to the outer islands.
I suppose it was the fact that she could finally see the world from my
perspective and didn't have to run although she could run circles around
the bike while I was blazing along with her on the ground. We went off
in the directions of Waimanalo while the gang hit the water. While in the
back of the valley a car comes up from behind. Not thinking about it
because I was off the road by at least 6 feet, we kept on trucking. WHAM!
I can still see myself flying up in the air. The picture will never leave my
mind. My bike was swept out from under me and I fell horizontal and flat
on my back. OH NO! My baby! I landed on my baby! I killed my baby!
Blood was everywhere. I stood up and picked up her lifeless body not
yet noticing what had happened to me. I looked at her.....then I looked
up at the car that had stopped about 100 feet ahead. The driver looked in
the rear view mirror.....and stepped on the gas and got the hell out of there.
She was dead and I was injured. I threw the bike in a ditch and started
looking for a house with a phone. The impact threw my slippers off in
the bushes. I carried the lifeless body of my baby for about 20 minutes
looking for a house to use a phone. By the time the ambulance came the
soles of both feet had burned off from the heat of the road. The kind
ambulance personnel allowed me to bring her limp body along with
me to the hospital. She gave her life saving mine. I smacked my lower
back, both elbows, and both heels. Kiki took all the weight of my upper
body and spared me from head, neck, and upper body injuries.
She was a "once in a lifetime" companion and will NEVER be forgotten.
Thank you, Kiki, for saving my life.....I will always cherish you.

A new beginning...

The loss of Kiki was devastating. Not even Brandon could make me laugh
any more now. Four weeks after the accident I got Ipo, the pup you see
Brandon holding on the first page. I foolishly thought that by replacing
Kiki I'd get over her faster. Life's not so easy. Somewhat similar thoughts
had been swirling through Brandon's head, but not about losing Kiki. He
was thinking that he may have lost me. He was feeling guilty for suggesting
Makapuu as I felt guilty for bringing Kiki along with us that day. Up to
that point I guess I never thought about how much I had meant to him
and had taken his friendship for granted. Soon thereafter he let his true
feelings be known to me. It was quite a shock to me to say very the least.
No, life is not easy at all. It was soon to become even more complicated.

We were playing Street Fighter II one day about 2 months after the
accident and I looked over at Bran because he was making those funny
noises that he always knew would make me laugh. He opened his
mouth like he was going to scream at the top of his lungs. I closed
my eyes, plugged my ears and turned 90 degrees away to avoid any
spray that came along with the scream. The scream never came.
Instead I felt a big wet kiss on my left cheek. I didn't know how to
respond. He just gave me a sweet smile and we continued to play the
game. I chuckled not giving it much thought at the time and although
it was somewhat of a shock I gave no weird reaction. That too will
forever be a moment frozen in my mind as if it were yesterday.

That must have given him confidence because soon I was getting stronger
messages from him that he wanted more from me than just friendship.
I just shrugged it off and still loved my little pal anyway. I couldn't,
I wouldn't give him what he wanted but still he remained my friend and
I his. By the time of the accident Brandon was almost 15 years old.
I wasn't about to mess with my "li'l bro" who was my friend's younger
brother. I also wasn't going to be a jerk and tell him to piss off.
I had become very attached to him as a friend and we remained so.

His persistence pays off...

Every day after school he'd be waiting for me to pick him up to go out
and goof around. By this time we, or I, hardly hung around with his
brother and the drinking gang. We were each other's buddies and that
was all we needed to be happy. As soon as I got off work I'd fly over
to school and pick him up and we'd do something that would occupy
our time. As Bran got older his overt pressure on me got stronger and
eventually instead of that little brother image I had of him I became
aware of a handsome young man growing up in front of my very eyes
who was truly in love with me. Go ahead and call me weak if you like.
By the time he had turned 17 I WAS gradually becoming weaker in
fighting the advances. Eventually I finally gave in and accepted the
love he had so badly wanted to share for so long. I returned that love.
We were like glue or Siamese twins by then, even before I surrendered.
I eventually became as infatuated with my now grown friend as he had
been with me all along. Life was blissful and every day was a day to look
forward to and treasure.. What was so wrong somehow became so right.
His love was so strong that he waited for me to be his first. That devotion
I will always treasure. Maybe it was by fate I was abstaining...who knows?
That combination made things very special when the fateful time arrived.
Our love was true and unwavering. We became one. Soon nothing else
mattered to us. Was it destiny? Was it luck? Was it a curse? Whatever it
was we soon accepted our fate and became true and faithful partners. By
then we were inseparable because our friendship and love had been laid
on so many different and solid foundations. I must admit that this has
got to be the most complex relationship of my life. The moment I accepted
and returned the love my babe so desperately wanted Heaven came to earth.
I believe that at this point the folks we knew and hung around with had
begun noticing something just a tad different about us and the way we
were acting. It may have been the way we'd look at each other and be in
total meltdown just from a simple smile, or that we would finish each other's
sentences. It got to the point we were almost psychic towards each other's
needs. He'd call me and I'd pick up the phone without it even ringing
because I'd be trying call him that very same moment or that I would call
him the moment he would be stressed out over something, not knowing
that something was wrong yet, just feeling something was amiss and vice
versa. We eventually had to start becoming very careful about what we
said or did, either in public or with friends and families as our love and
affection was becoming more and more evident and noticeable to the
people who knew us well. We were in total sync, harmony, and Heaven.
Just a scent, just a touch, a whisper, smile, hug, or kiss and we were.......
happy. I've never melted so badly in my life. That Bran...what can I say?
I've also never enjoyed so thoroughly giving my all to my one and only.
Was I stupid for waiting? Who knows.....maybe...maybe not.......but I
kinda kick myself for the extra years of love I missed.....er.....waited on.
(Personally I think he was stupid to wait.. :) cuz my mind was made up,
Bran)

When Worlds collide...

I suppose it was inevitable. His friends became mine and mine his.
Our worlds were on a collision course. When you lead a straight life
with straight friends and nobody has any understanding that you are
not of the same orientation as they things get rather sticky. Instead
of going out openly we started sneaking around even just to hang out
to simply enjoy each other's company. Nobody would understand our
love for each other so we started ducking everyone. Still things were
hard on us.....especially for Brandon. He was taking a lot of shit about
us from his friends. He didn't like it but would not let go. That is why
I will forever be his puppy dog. Things just got harder and harder but,
still, our love flourished. This past autumn we decided that we had
better cool it just a bit to escape the pressure. Just after Christmas
my babe left, by mutual decision, temporarily, to live with his brother
Dave who had since moved to the mainland. We are both hurting badly
for each other, but plan to get things back together again by this summer.
We are hoping that the temporary move quells the rumors. We aren't
ready to come out....at least to the people we know and we may never.
Bran turned 21 this past summer. We're looking forward to spending
his next birthday together and to celebrate the 10th anniversary of our
first meeting this summer. With luck my love will return sooner than that.
We'll see. In the meantime we remain faithful to each other. From there
we'll, or at the very least try to, figure out how to deal with a solution to
our situation. Can we find one? We've been through some pretty rough
times from the pressure but perhaps it has made us stronger for enduring.
The last 2 years have not been a bed of roses for of us because of the
external pressure brought about by fear of being found out by our
"ohana." Some people close to us had been starting to suspect something.
Will we ever escape that? We don't know. Please accept us for who we are.
We love each other so much and love you all for accepting us.

Thank you for reading and caring enough to learn about us,

Bran & Steve

Written by Steve & approved by the boss :)

This story is not yet complete. There are 10 years worth of happy times to
tell you of. It is a tad harder putting those experiences together for you so
please bear with me as I attempt to compose "Heaven on earth." It may
take a little while. Sorry. Steve

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